I am not a very confident person. It has been a major issue throughout my life, stemming from anxiety about being the 'wrong' kind of person. While I have taken steps to work on myself and have started forcing myself into uncomfortable situations by faking confidence, something my dad said to me one night really stuck with me.
I made a joke about how I am (almost) 21 years old, and I still need to text my mom frequently to make sure my outfits are okay. My dad laughed, but then told me, "You really need to be more confident. Either that, or learn to just not care." I laughed for a second but since then, I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.
Similar to my realizations with the Supposed To's, it got me wondering what I really worried about. I don't really care what other people think, but I really do want to get everything right. But then, what's right? What's right for one person might not be what's right for someone else, so should I even be worried at all?
I'm an extremely anxious person and I worry about most things. I realize that there's no set path for me, and there's no rules for how or who I'm supposed to be. It's confusing and stressful, but that's part of the point. If we all followed the same path, we wouldn't figure out who we're supposed to be. Which is what I keep telling myself.
So if I can't be confident, I can at least fake it and not care what anyone else thinks. I'm forging my path and becoming myself, and I think that's something to be proud of, not self conscious of.
No comments:
Post a Comment